this year will end in arson for me. i will burn down all of it. all the things that have made the people around me into who they are. they've turned into these little judgmental gremlins that come with instructions and everything. always giving me these looks that make it look like the flesh is going to peel of my bones. but i am not upset. im not upset at all about who my friends have become. some people are just meant to be acquaintance in your life. while others are there forever. im coming off as angry i think but i really am not honestly. im just amazed on what my life has become. about who i have become. i used to be so sensitive and gullible. but now i actually feel like i am my own person and not someone just being told what to do. it feels good. i feel good. i feel like as if i have been born again. but i think that i worry about other people to much. i always want to help someone who feels lonely or sad. it pains me to see people like this. but its normal for me to see these emotions. like Ryan Adams said when your young you get sad.

this man is an amazing artist this album has helped me through breakups and the works. i feel like as if i have left this post unfinished but i dont know what else i should add to it. and i dont want to save it because i know i wont come back to it. these are just some random thoughts going through my head right know. i haven t really figured out where im heading in life but i certainly know where iv been and i never want to go back again. im sort of a cornball when it comes to these things but i love my corniness it something that really defines me.